when i was in my teenage years, i have a hobby. i was really addicted to it. i bought them but at times i don't even open it. today, i had to threw some of it away as i need to make space in my room. it was quite hard for me to be separated from it. i spent 4 long hours looking through it again and try to convince myself that i don't need them. i even jot down the amount i had. in total, 173. i might have more but was thrown away in the previous years. my hobby brought bittersweet memories with my mom. because my mom will always want me to get rid of it. but i, find it really hard, try to hide them somewhere. it's been a decade. but eventually today, i decided to let it go.
it all started 10 years ago, when i was in secondary school, the green polka dots uniform. when i think about it, maybe that was how my interest for psychology develops.
what's my hobby you'll ask. it's collecting magazines.
i fell in love with magazines! not because of fashion but because of the articles and aunt agony. mostly it's the cover page that intrigued me. it makes me want to buy and read about it. and so that was how it start. i collect different kinds of them. not only local ones but also overseas.
lime teens teenage smash hits tv hits max bliss girlfriend teen (us) seventeen (us) seventeen (singapore) vanity fair cleo female her world cosmo girl elle cosmopolitan
you can see my maturity level. like it moves from teens, girlfriend (adik-adik) mags to female, cleo (kakak-kakak) mags.
haha. now to think back, it was a waste of money. really, because some mag costs more than $7. at least i've spend $25 per month on them.
i collected them in 1999 and stop collecting in 2004. i think i realised that i have no more space to hide those magazine and thus i had to stop buying them.
most of the cover pages were dusty.
when i looked through them, there were 2 of the mags that i bought twice. haha. i can't even remember whether i've bought them.
it was pearl harbour that makes me go gaga over him. haha.
as i try not to be emotional about it, i distracted myself by taking pictures of the same celebrity in different mags.
after 4 hours of arranging, looking through, jotting down, reading some articles, i decided to keep the below.
and throw away the below, which mostly are teens, teenages and lime. goodbye teenage years, hello adult world! they've been great companion throughout the long bus ride to school. =) it is quite an achievement that i am able to throw them away. because it wasn't easy convincing myself that things won't last, i am an adult i need to accept things, etc. but in the end i managed. good job nurul! =)
the problem with me is i like to keep things and never throw them. just like the bouquet of flowers below. it has been almost 2 years. if i have a choice i would have keep it. but mom helped me throw it.
haha. nurul is going to be a karang guni. hopefully not la. i wish that i can get over my problem and have lesser things in my house in the future.
dinosaur you are ancient which is why it is harder for me to get rid of you. =)
my fingers did the typing at 22:26
Saturday, November 14
i've spent my saturday sleeping. to convince myself, i take it as a short-mini-break-before-the-study-marathon-kicks-in!
let me try to use what i've learnt to help myself to study. (using implementative mindset instead of deliberative mindset) i, nurul atirah bte mahmuddin, will start revising for my modules on the 15th nov 09, at 10am.
next, have to plan right? because failling to plan is planning for failure.
so so so. since i have 3 examinable modules because 2 of my modules this semester are non examinable, i have ample time to revise. social cog, psychobiological perspectives on emotion and io psych.
below are just for my own reference. i need a reminder. =)
15 nov, social cog (2 chapters) psychobiological perspectives on emotion (1 chapter)
16 nov, social cog (2 chapters) psychobiological perspectives on emotion (2 chapters) io psych (1 chaper)
17 nov, social cog (1 chapter) psychobiological perspectives on emotion (1 chapters)
18 nov, social cog (1 chapter) psychobiological perspectives on emotion (1 chapter) io psych (1 chapter)
19 nov, social cog (overall revision) psychobiological perspectives on emotion (overall revision) io psych (1 chapter)
20 nov - 23 nov, social cog (overall revision) psychobiological perspectives on emotion (overall revision)
24 nov - social cognition exam
25 nov - psychobiological perspectives on emotion exam
26 nov, io psych (2 chapters)
27 nov, io psych (1 chaper + overall revision)
28 nov - 30 nov, io psych (overall revision)
*phew* i am done planning. gambaru! it will soon be over!
my fingers did the typing at 17:31
Friday, November 13
my last cup of tea for the semester. and i am going to miss the tea with milk. really. it tastes so nice. it's thicker and just right for me. apart from my sweater, the cup of tea keeps me warm. at times, my tongue gets scalded because i was too eager to drink the tea. everytime i took a sip of the tea, i feel a sense of boost! like so shiok! and i ended up sipping more. so i ended up finishing the tea even before lecture ends. haha. the days in school. =)
after lecture today, rush for a meeting in newton. dinner was delifrance. sponsored by a committee member. thanks samantha! i had a great time eating the fruit tarts! afterwhich we had a dance practice. it was fun!
i was glad to know that the ladies share the happiness together. their faces beam and i sensed it was sincere. =)
the partner has been really busy with work. and i miss the fact that there wasn't anyone to tease me and i can't tease him much. nevertheless, he still makes me smile, blush, laugh and giggle. just something that i needed. this weekend is going to be kinda boring without him but at the same time, i am trying to convince myself that i need to study for the finals. so........ not so bad. but if i have a chance to go out with him, i will. haha. distressing session. =) but he has his finals to revise also. we'll make time somehow. =)
i am getting nervous and excited as the days pass. because you may never know. but somehow i find peace. =) that's the best gift. syukur alhamdulillah.
dinosaur, i am smiling widely just by typing d-i-n-o-s-a-u-r.
my fingers did the typing at 23:11
Thursday, November 12
recently, the weather has been chilly. and i like it whenever i wake up. it's cooling. and right now, at night, it is still chilly.
most of the essays, group presentations, tests are done. now what's left is the examinations. 3 papers and i am done.
i learnt something about life. one of it is being humble. because we are all the same. we are still human. what do you got to win if you're arrogant? self esteem? well, maybe. how do you judge that you're better? more $$$, better looking? maybe. but do realise that those never last. =) i supposed that when one is humble, the way they talk to you are sincere.
how can we not be arrogant? i guess we can try to control ourselves not to judge people by their looks. because once you judged them, you have a lot of assumptions about them, which can be true and some aren't. and those assumptions are going to affect the way you talk/treat them. try reading on the self fulfilling prophecy. =)
what is life without lessons? it's worthless. =)
open your eyes and start learning. =)
my fingers did the typing at 21:11
Wednesday, November 11
dinosaur, you handled it well. thank you for being such a supportive and concerned partner. even though i was down by the news, you managed to make me gleam. thank you sweetheart.
i have no idea what i appeared in your eyes, even though i was so slack with my dishevelled hair, you still make me blush. thanks for adding quality to my life.
my heart finally gleam. and it's real. let's work it together.
my fingers did the typing at 00:20
Monday, November 9
when i look at the calender, i feel scared by the numbers. like it's so fast it's going to be december and end of 2009.
this week is going to pass so fast with so many things to keep me occupied.
thanks to the onions, i keep farting today. of course not when there's people around me.
i managed to get an afternoon nap just now. it felt so so so so good! it's been so long since i had an afternoon nap. and i know i can't have them when i'll start to work.
i've watched the amazing race earlier and not only that i like some of the cool tasks that they have to do but i also like it whenever they praise one another for the work they have done, to motivate their partner. =)
i am sleepy yet i have tasks to do.
ellesaur, happily together.
my fingers did the typing at 22:22
Sunday, November 8
my dinner. together with the partner and his parents. sorry it is just the leftover. we had dinner, indian style. naan, thosai, briyani, murtabak! i had naan. and while eating, i felt incomplete. you know why? cause there's wasn't any onions! i am hooked to onion that just seeing onion increase my appetite. even thought it makes my throat uncomfortable the next day, i still like to eat them. i guess i got addicted to onions years back when the partner brought me to a eating place near mustaffa centre. that place i was told by the partner has closed down. only memories of it was left. back to that place, ok so whenever we dine there, they would always serve us onions and a lime. it's tempting. and so i tried. so eventually, i got hooked to onions.
before we had our dinner, we went to collect an item. haha. swee swee la. 11 and 22 how coincidence is that? ok, you guys might not know about the number. i mean 11 is his birthdate. while mine is 22. very swee!
i've got a test tomorrow. *sighs* let's hope my brain is efficient tomorrow!
anyway, i have no idea why does my body feel really lethargic. like my body is pulled downwards and make me really tired.
after this week, i have some planning to do. especially the pets carnival. alamak! so funny that i am heading this event. because i have a phobia on animals yet i took this up. haha! i have no idea how to survive on that day! make sure my senses are on extra alert!
not only that i am afraid of animals. the partner also has phobia on animals. haha! what a couple! honey, i might need your help on that day!
i ought to get back to the lecture notes!
dinosaur, swee ah!
my fingers did the typing at 23:09
yesterday was a moody day for me. and i have so many reasons because of it. like the strain in my eyes is causing me a headache. like the weather. like how tired i was. and many more.
and so my grandma, mom and the partner had to go through my moodiness since we got to find some items together. the partner knowing that i am not normal, tried to lighten my mood, he kept tripping me by 'accidentally' kicking my leg. aiyayaya! he never stops la and keeps laughing at me every sucessful time he managed to 'trip' me. somehow i wasn't irritated by it. in fact, i played along. and tried tripping him but to no avail.
since his soccer match got cancelled, the four of us went to eat arnold's. from my memory, that was the first time i ate at arnold's. however mom told me that when i was younger, they used to bring me to arnold to eat. hmmmm. maybe i was way too young! back to yesterday, chicken was nice, just that the place was cramped and noisy.
late night we head over to his aunt chalet for a birthday celebration. and i've managed to know more about his dad's family. the partner managed to do something that he always wanted to do since young! and he said he's like a monkey! haha!
no pictures for yesterday because i can't be bothered. too moody. haha.
i wanted today to be a stay-at-home-day to complete some stuff that's been bothering me. but i got to meet the partner together with his parents to collect an item. ok la. to distress.
this upcoming week is my last week in school. my last week of SCHOOLING DAYS (insyaAllah if my grades allow me to graduate)! after 2+ 6 + 5 + 3 + 2.5 = 18.5 years of school! *phew* i might pick up school again when i'm stable in work and family life.
i better get back to what i was doing!
my fingers did the typing at 12:32
Friday, November 6
and so tonight we had a birthday celebration for nenek and my uncle. it was a feast!
the kids (which i was included)!
and the elders. dad was behind the camera thus he wasn't in.
the reason the below picture was taken was because i wanted to see how syafiqah's new glasses look on me.
fatin and her kakak.
syafiqah, atirah, insyirah.
haha! look at the amount of things popping from my face! all thanks to late night sleep, essays, presentations. i don't really bother how i look this few days. because too tired.
anyway, tonight was a good dinner! thank goodness dad fetched me home from school earlier because i really cannot take it.
right now, my eyes are getting heavier every minute, the results of 2 hrs of sleep a day earlier and a 4hrs of sleep yesterday. i am really tired now.
i'm going to have a day of unexpected events tomorrow. let it be good. =)
my fingers did the typing at 23:42
Thursday, November 5
happy monthly with you, happy being with you.
a month left, 30 more days to conclude the end of this year. hahahahahahaahahah! wake up!
dinosaur, do you feel the heat yet? because the elephant has thick skin, the elephant has yet to feel it yet.
love taught me so much. and i know at the end of the day, i am a step closer to my ideal self.
it feels so so good to be back! to the way i was. syukur alhamdullilah.
my fingers did the typing at 00:21
nurul atirah mahmuddin
22 december 1986
email: nurulatirah@hotmail.com sign: cusp of sagittarius and capricorn an undergraduate in national university of singapore loves: family. shopping. surprises. burping. jokes. scents. foliages. nature. scenery. soothing music. antiques. shoes. reading. god. life. thinking. mind. stars. flowers. colourful things. chocolates. ice cream.
